May 6, 2008...7:12 pm
Atheist Porn and Other Teases
So last night while idly perusing the Internets, I came across a link promising some real, honest-to-goodness Atheist Porn. No, I don’t mean that video of the Four Horsemen that makes so many New Atheists all tingly. I mean, actual porn, with boobies and everything. So naturally, I had to research further.
Alas, while AtheistPorn.com does indeed feature boobies, there are only two, and they’re partially covered. The site’s slogan is simple — “No Heaven, No Hell, Just Porno” — but so far they only live up to the first two-thirds of it. The good stuff, the site assures us, is “coming soon.” (Presumably before the Second Coming.)
But not to worry, horny atheists. Because there’s at least one porn star out there who is an actual atheist: the legendary Asia Carrera (real name, Jessica Andrea Steinhauser). And you’ll be glad to know that her arguments for atheism are as sophisticated as Dawkins’ himself. As she explained to one of her fans:
“I am a diehard atheist, and have been since I was about 5 and discovered to my annoyance that there was no santa claus, no easter bunny, and no tooth fairy. well, that was it for me - I resolved then and there that no one was going to sucker ME into believing in any more invisible characters with superpowers!”
She’s even got an assortment of atheist jokes up on her web site. Here’s the first one:
God said, “Let there be light.”
Nothing happened for a few moments.
Then God said, “Who the heck am I talking to?”
Not bad, but it’s pretty much all downhill from there:
Is it an accident that the symbol of a bishop is a crook and the sign of an archbishop is a double-cross?
If man is fallible, is it possible his interpretations of religion are as well?
Neither a rimshot or a rim-anything-else could save that last one.
If this gets any athiests reading this too hot, the quickest way to cool down is with a quick trip to XXXChurch.com, which bills itself as the “#1 Christian Porn Site.”
I don’t quite know how that could be. I spent an hour watching their videos and no one even took their pants off!
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